Teen Mental Health in Crisis

3 Apr

Why Parents Are the Missing Link

If you’re raising a teen right now, you don’t need me to quote statistics. You already know something’s not right. The spark in your child feels dimmer. They’ve gone quieter, moodier… maybe they're shutting themselves in their room or snapping at every small thing.

And while we hear a lot about therapy, diagnosis, and digital dangers, there’s a huge part of the conversation that keeps getting left out: parents.

Not in a “this is your fault” kind of way but in a you’re more powerful than you think kind of way.

As a psychotherapist and parenting coach, I’ve supported so many parents who are exhausted, scared, and just want to help their child. But what they’re often missing isn’t love it’s the tools to reconnect when things feel tense, distant, or broken.

Let’s talk about why your role matters more than ever and how you can feel more confident and calm as you support your teen through the tough times.

What’s Really Going On With Our Teens?

There’s no denying it—teen mental health is in crisis. Right now, around 4 in 10 teens are struggling with anxiety, sadness, or hopelessness. And more than 1 in 5 have seriously considered ending their life. That’s a heartbreaking and scary reality for far too many families.

Teens are under enormous pressure with school, social media, friendships, figuring out who they are… all while recovering from years of uncertainty and disruption. They’re overwhelmed, and many don’t have the coping skills to manage it all.

But what I want you to know: amidst all the services and support systems, you, the parent, are the most consistent, powerful, and grounding influence in your teen’s world.

And when you know how to show up, especially in the messy moments, you can turn things around more than you might realise.

Why Parents Are So Often the Missing Link

We tend to think teen mental health lives in therapy rooms or school wellbeing policies. And yes those things matter. But your teen spends most of their time with you. And the relationship you have with them? That’s the bit that’s often missing in wider conversations.

Teens don’t just need advice or interventions, they need connection. They need someone who can sit with them in the tough stuff without trying to fix it all straight away. Someone who doesn’t overreact or shut down. Someone who says, “I see you, I hear you, and I’m here.”

That’s not about perfection—it’s about presence. Our teens aren’t broken, therefore we don’t need to fix, but we do need to move from fixer to coach.

The Turning Point Starts at Home

Let me tell you about Sarah, a mum I worked with recently. Her 15 year old son, Jack, had become withdrawn, snappy, and unpredictable. Every day after school, it was the same pattern—she’d ask how his day was, and he’d grunt or blow up. It would spiral from there.

She felt like she was losing him.

When we first spoke, she was exhausted. Tired of walking on eggshells, tired of trying to do the right thing and still ending up in arguments. She wanted to help but everything she tried just seemed to push him further away.

So we did a reset.

We started with her, not him.

Instead of reacting straight away when Jack got moody, she practiced taking a breath, grounding herself, and showing up calm. She stopped asking 10 questions the moment he walked through the door. Instead, she’d say, “Hey love, I’m making a cuppa if you want one.” And then she’d leave space.

Within a couple of weeks, the tension started to soften. Jack lingered in the kitchen a bit longer. One day, completely unprompted, he said: “I had a rough day.”

Just like that, the door began to open.

The R.E.S.E.T. Method (The Framework I Teach All My Coaching Clients)

In moments like Sarah’s, I guide parents through what I call the R.E.S.E.T. Method. It’s a five-step approach I created from years of experience, designed to help you move from panic to presence, and from conflict to connection.

Here’s what it looks like:

R – Recognise the Real Issue
Is this defiance or fear? Misbehaviour or stress? I help you spot what’s really going on beneath the behaviour.

E – Empathise in the Moment
Respond with calm words that de-escalate, not intensify, the conflict.

S – Say What Matters (Without a Fight)
Get the right words at the right time: what to say, what not to say, and when to stay quiet.

E – Emotionally Regulate (Together)
Your calm is contagious. I coach you through staying steady even when emotions run high.

T – Take Action with Confidence
No second-guessing. I’m in your pocket to help you take the next step with clarity.

If You’re Not Sure Where to Start…

Here are a few small things you can try today:

Swap fixing for listening. Try “That sounds tough” before “Have you tried…?”
Pause before reacting. One deep breath can change the whole vibe.
Pick your moments. Teens open up more during low-pressure times—walks, car rides, making toast.
Use empathy phrases. “I can see this really got to you.” “I’d have felt like that too.”
Focus on connection, not control. You don’t need to solve everything. You just need to be there.

You’re Not Failing. You’re Just Ready for a New Way.

If you’ve been stuck in silence or shouting, that doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent, it means you’re human. And you’re ready for a different way forward.

Teen mental health is complex. But your presence, your steadiness, your willingness to try something new? It matters more than you know.

You don’t have to do it alone.

If you’re facing those really tough moments, when your teen refuses to get out of bed, avoids school, pushes every boundary, or you’re lying awake at night out of your mind - I offer on-demand support to guide you through it.

Using the R.E.S.E.T. Method, I coach parents like you—voice and text support, right when you need it most. You send me a message in the moment, and I help you think clearly, respond calmly, and rebuild connection step by step.

Because sometimes, you don’t need another appointment, you just need someone there.

Let’s reset the way we support our teens, starting at home, together.

Email info@parentologyworld.com and lets start making these teen years a lot easier!

Laura x